PonyPonyShow

spytap:

blocksonblox:

Man..when I was 16, I swore it was awesome to be an adult. I mean, I thought I was a full-on adult at 16…but the whole living on my own would be so cool. I’d like party all the time and not care about anything, totally right? And then I became an adult. I realized today that I only go to work, home, the gym, and the grocery store. That’s it. I’m not out late every night. I don’t have any money and I think I’m beyond the stage of asking mommy and daddy for an extra $5 bucks. And the strangest thing about this is, I didn’t realize my life had become this until I started thinking about it earlier this week. I’m not trying to be all reflective or pretentious or whatever but really, is this it?

Your 20s are for fucking up. They’re foundation for adulthood - training wheels. They’re where you learn to be an adult, learn how to deal with expectations without hand-holding, learn how to drink, learn to integrate with normal society, learn to have and hold a job, learn to think for yourself, learn how large the world is and how small your place in it is. You learn what mistakes you’re prone to make in life, love, relationships, and how to fix, change, and avoid making them again. You begin to separate where you really want to be in this world from where you’d thought you wanted to be in this world when “this world” consisted of the block you grew up on. You learn how to handle money in a serious context for the first time - because all of a sudden money becomes more than just “what you pay the rent with and use the extra for booze.” You learn the difference between a “job,” a “career,” and a “dream,” but more importantly you realize what steps are needed to fulfill all three.

In your 20s you’re becoming you, and learning what it means to be you - but more importantly you’re laying the foundation of fuck-ups and faultlines that let you take that knowledge and suddenly begin asking the question “Now that I know this about myself - now that I understand the basics of being me and what I want and need…where do I want to go with it?”

So to answer your question: Is this it? Yes and no. It is for now, it won’t be forever. You’ll fight and cry and wonder and wander and soon enough you’ll be able to look inward and realize “I understand this now, and I’m ready.” And then you’ll take that knowledge (and hopefully retain no small part of the the wonder as well) and use it to confidently walk forward into the world, ready to plant your flag in a section of it.

You’re not doing it right. You don’t say how old you are now, but get out there. Get some new friends, take some trapeeze lessons or something. How you lead your life now is how you will lead it when you’re 40 (and yes, that will be all there is) unless YOU change what you don’t like. Take some chances.